Contact and Boundary: An Overview
By Shea Stevens, last edited 11/13/23
Gestalt therapy theory is deeply interested in boundaries. Boundaries involve questions about how we make contact with our environment, with others, and even ourselves. “Making contact” is a central goal for the client in gestalt therapy. This is deeply connected to the fundamental goal of awareness. In therapy you might explore how you make contact, or don’t make contact. How and when do you reach out to connect? Or draw back, or seek protection? The more that your boundaries are unclear or confused, the less intentional and flexible you will be— more likely to be stuck on auto-pilot.
“A person exists by differentiating self from other and by connecting self and other. These are the two functions of a boundary. To make good contact with one’s world, it is necessary to risk reaching out and discovering one’s own boundaries. Effective self-regulation includes contact in which one is aware of novelty in the environment that is potentially nourishing or toxic. That which is nourishing is assimilated and all else is rejected.” (Yontef, 1993. p 141)
Yontef also points out, “this requires people to be willing to trust their taste and judgement.” This is an important part of practicing intentional boundaries. Rebuilding self-trust takes time.
Yontef illustrates the connection between contact and awareness:
“The person who verbally acknowledges his situation but does not really see it, know it, react to it and feel in response to it is not fully aware and is not in full contact. The person who is aware knows what he does, how he does it, that he has alternatives and that he chooses to be as he is.” (Gary Yontef, 1993)
Modifications to Contact
The ways we make contact can be modified. Modifications to contact are adaptations depending on the situation and the needs of the individual. Sometimes you connect/ make your boundary permeable, and other times you disconnect/protect/become less permeable. Some say there are no “shoulds” in gestalt therapy; the important thing is to be aware of the situation and your own wants and needs, and to be intentional and flexible to make adjustments.
Here is a chart showing ways that contact can be modified along various spectrums. Some of these terms were inherited from psychoanalytic language:
There may be situations that call for any of the above contact styles. Defense mechanisms are sometimes important and necessary, in a certain context. The chart (from Dave Mann’s Gestalt Therapy:100 Key Points) was adapted from the work of MacKewn (1997). The concept of assimilation mentioned in the middle of this chart was central to Fritz and Laura Perls in the creation of gestalt therapy theory, and they used the word assimilation interchangeably with integration. This chart also brings me to the topic of polarities. I wrote more about integration and polarities here.
References:
Awareness, Dialogue, and Process (1993) written by Gary Yontef. p 141-143
Gestalt Therapy: 100 Key Points and Techniques (2010) written by Dave Mann. pp 34-35, 55-56